The false virtues

Character development is critical to the success of a child for a strong character is the best indicator of future success, it is far more important than intelligence or physical ability, although they do play a large role, for character allows you to live your life to its fullness.

If you Google ‘Character’ you will find many different definitions of character.  Depending on the source or the viewpoint of the author they can vary wildly but the common theme in them is that good character rests upon the practice of virtue.  As an educator this certainly squares with my experience. Those students who are virtuous invariably also have the strongest characters.

Character defines how you approach life, your world view, your mindset.  A person with strong character varies not from day to day but acts consistently.   A person of good character lives according to commonly held ideals. The speak honestly, act honorably, treat others respectfully, in other words they exemplify God’s attributes and they do it day after day.  If you have ever tried it you know, it is tough stuff.

Reading scripture it takes very little time at all to develop a laundry list of God’s attributes that we should copy.   God defines faithfulness, patience, long suffering, honor, and of course, love. No matter how long you make the list there are two commonly held ‘virtues’ that will never make it.

Fairness and niceness are not virtues and outside of certain select circumstance, are not worth very much. 

Fairness says treat everyone the same or else it isn't fair.  Alas, everyone differs from the other as do our needs and our resources.  Just about everything on the planet differs does it make sense to give them all the same?  Do those who live on the equator need homes with central heating? Or do inhabitants of Alaska or Northern Canada need air conditioning?   Outside of sports, fairness doesn't work.  What we want is not fairness but justice.  We want the poor taken care of, not because it is unfair that the rich have excess and the poor starve but because it is unjust that anyone be deprived of the ability to live honorably.  Another problem with fairness is that it is completely unachievable because as soon as you start to reach it, differences arise.  It is not fair that some people are healthy and others are not, that some people are better looking than others or smarter, or richer, or better at sports and there is no way to make it fair.  However we can all love better, treat each other with greater kindness, share from our excess. That we can do.

What about niceness? Don’t we all want to be nice? Who wants to say or do something that others won’t like? Isn't it best not to upset?   Take a look at the bible, God doesn't seem very nice does He? Jesus keeps convicting people of their sin, he calls sin a sin and calls upon the sinners to repent or face the wrath of God!  He even turns over the tables in the temple.  He says some very hard things.  All of Jesus actions demonstrate love, the selfless desire for the good of another. 

It is far better to be honest than nice.  For if I am nice all the time, how does anyone know I am telling the truth?  It may not be nice to tell someone they are an alcoholic, but it is essential if they are ever to be helped.  It isn't nice to have to tell someone they are dying of cancer, failed a test, or did not get the job  but it is just to let them know.  We should be tactful and kind   willing to say things that may not be welcome but that are necessary   

Let us pray our leaders can do such a thing.